It is not about him
You come to me with complaints about your relationship. You talk about his behavior, how he doesn't see or understand you. You believe that he is the problem. You ask if I can work with your man, or even better, both of you as a couple. You think that dragging him to couples coaching will take the responsibility off your plate.
You've been sending him articles, subtly coaching him, and pointing out where he's going wrong. You believe you know him better than you know yourself. You're skilled at deflecting the attention away from you. You outsource responsibility and desperately try to maintain control. You hold onto a false sense of power, thinking that if only he changed, you would have what you wanted.
You feel an internal desperation, but you judge it and it manifests in other ways. The truth is, you're a deeply feminine being, overflowing with emotions that need to be acknowledged and embraced. You've tried so hard to keep a lid on it, managing him as a strategy, but it no longer works. That thing inside you can no longer be shackled.
When you come to me, I see right through it. Because let me tell you, this was me. I was the Queen of Managing my Man, mothering, and squandering my own magic by using him. I did it all until I finally let go and learned to harness the power within myself. I started managing the bigness of my own life and let go of trying to manage his.
When women like you come to me, I say: Work with me. Make a commitment for an entire year that is as big as it is uncomfortable. Learn what it feels like to bring your attention fully back to yourself, without holding back. Learn to soften, to stop strategizing, and to be vulnerable. Open yourself up and start trusting yourself. You have the ability to take care of yourself; you just have to be willing to learn.
What is actually inside you is so incredibly powerful, and men love it. They want to feel you and be influenced by your desire and magic. They crave the messy woman who embraces her humanity and can hold herself. Let your man experience the real you and see how it transforms your relationship.
Yes, he has his own work to do, but I have seen relationships (and lives) completely transformed when women start leading with 100% of their desire.
Is it easy? Nope. This is the work of a grown woman. It's time to say goodbye to the baby girl who seeks saving, soothing, and safety. This is for the WOMEN. This is the real work, and I am ready for you when you are ready for yourself.